Dinner for one

Tonight is the last night I will be home alone and Mike will be back from his conference in New Orleans. I just finished my dinner for one consisting of steak salad, miso soup, and mango for dessert. While I am chewing my obligatory 10 chew per bites, I was being hyponitized by Max. He likes to sit at my foot and stare. He is probably thinking "drop drop drop drop" OMG I am one those nuts who spends all her time talking about her dog....hehe...
Back to my musing about being alone. I can't believe how much I miss it!I miss Mikey but its nice to come home and decide when and what I want to eat. I can walk around with no slippers, have the TV, Internet, and radio running while using none of it. I can sit in the dark or turn on every light in the house and I don't have to answer to anyone, NO ONE! I am screaming right now on the top of my lungs (its freakin Max out a bit, but its okay). IF you are alone right now and reading this, won't you please join me? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Hear Ye Hear Ye...MAX goes for an audition

Watch out Hollywood here comes Max-a-rooni! Our lovely boy is going to be auditioning for a show called Groomer Has It! Its a reality show for groomers to compete to be the best groomer in the nation. Okay, let me go back a few weeks. After my annoying and injury free accident with the MTA bus, I came across a bit of luck. I was at the Silverlake Dog Park and was approached to take pictures for a reality show on Animal Planet. (Keep the image of me on Orangutan Island or Good Pets gone Wild on hold.) Now he will be auditioning to see if he is camera ready! Now I went online to check out the show and it said that it will "turn the scruffiest dogs into prancing pups". Uh...should I be offended that my dog is going to be on a make over show? Who cares! He is going to be on TV! Lets hope that I will get some TV time too, look for my silver chucks!

Jordan's Loves...

Here is a snippet of a recent conversation.
"Jordan,What do you love? "
"I love hills, I love ice cream, I love Max"
"Do you love Mike?"
"Nope,I love hills"

Hole burning in my stomach

WARNING GRAPHIC DETAILS

Right now I feel like there is a hole burning through my stomach and I predict explosive diarrhea in a few hours. I am not sure if other people are going through the same changes but my stomach is no longer made of steel. I just came back from Indian food and ate just two or three or five too many helping of spicy pickled vegetable chutney and now I have a hole in my stomach. Is there a solution to this? I mean I am officially addicted to Boiling Crab with the whole chabang seasoning and after a few pounds of shrimp, my exit is screaming for extinguisher. Suggestions on how to maintain my love of spicy food and be nice to the other end?