Dinner for one

Tonight is the last night I will be home alone and Mike will be back from his conference in New Orleans. I just finished my dinner for one consisting of steak salad, miso soup, and mango for dessert. While I am chewing my obligatory 10 chew per bites, I was being hyponitized by Max. He likes to sit at my foot and stare. He is probably thinking "drop drop drop drop" OMG I am one those nuts who spends all her time talking about her dog....hehe...
Back to my musing about being alone. I can't believe how much I miss it!I miss Mikey but its nice to come home and decide when and what I want to eat. I can walk around with no slippers, have the TV, Internet, and radio running while using none of it. I can sit in the dark or turn on every light in the house and I don't have to answer to anyone, NO ONE! I am screaming right now on the top of my lungs (its freakin Max out a bit, but its okay). IF you are alone right now and reading this, won't you please join me? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Hear Ye Hear Ye...MAX goes for an audition

Watch out Hollywood here comes Max-a-rooni! Our lovely boy is going to be auditioning for a show called Groomer Has It! Its a reality show for groomers to compete to be the best groomer in the nation. Okay, let me go back a few weeks. After my annoying and injury free accident with the MTA bus, I came across a bit of luck. I was at the Silverlake Dog Park and was approached to take pictures for a reality show on Animal Planet. (Keep the image of me on Orangutan Island or Good Pets gone Wild on hold.) Now he will be auditioning to see if he is camera ready! Now I went online to check out the show and it said that it will "turn the scruffiest dogs into prancing pups". Uh...should I be offended that my dog is going to be on a make over show? Who cares! He is going to be on TV! Lets hope that I will get some TV time too, look for my silver chucks!

Jordan's Loves...

Here is a snippet of a recent conversation.
"Jordan,What do you love? "
"I love hills, I love ice cream, I love Max"
"Do you love Mike?"
"Nope,I love hills"

Hole burning in my stomach

WARNING GRAPHIC DETAILS

Right now I feel like there is a hole burning through my stomach and I predict explosive diarrhea in a few hours. I am not sure if other people are going through the same changes but my stomach is no longer made of steel. I just came back from Indian food and ate just two or three or five too many helping of spicy pickled vegetable chutney and now I have a hole in my stomach. Is there a solution to this? I mean I am officially addicted to Boiling Crab with the whole chabang seasoning and after a few pounds of shrimp, my exit is screaming for extinguisher. Suggestions on how to maintain my love of spicy food and be nice to the other end?

What we spend all our time talking about...

We are totally obsessed with Max.

Its a BOY

Meet Max...the latest addition to our family. He is a Welsh Corgi Mix but he just looks like a cute mutt. Adopting this dog was a real insight to the future of parenting between Mike and I. Let me give you a brief synopsis of our conversation:
"We can only get a dog if we keep it outside"
"We can only get a small dog that we cage train and block off in the kitchen. I don't want it to jump on our sofa and get it dirty."
"No promises if we go look at the pound"
We walk away with the adoption papers in hand.
"We need make sure its housebroken. Lets start cage training."
Whining from the dog...
"Maybe we shouldn't cage train?"
more Whining...
"Maybe we can let him out of the kitchen and let him roam around. We can block off the hallway to the bedroom."
I firmly want to cage train.
"Lets let him be in his cage but in our bedroom"
We get up at 5:20am to watch him poop and pee in our yard.

Apparently I am heartless and he is spineless. Can you just imagine the discipline with children? I refuse to be the bad cop...since I play one all day at work.

Weekend Warriors and possible draft dodgers

Again not realizing that it actually takes work to maintain a blog I realized I have been MIA from this virtual world. Sometimes I feel like LIFE slips me roofies and I wake up groggy and not sure if I had unprotected sex. (Which I know didn't happen because living together actually lowers the mating rituals)
Well almost two months later we moved into our new place and managed to redo the electrical, paint the inside and out and buy new furniture. HGTV should really put up a disclaimer of how much actual time it takes to maintain a home. Its shocking to realize that you can't build a deck in 30 minutes much less hang a curtain...I mean they do it! Ah..the magic of television. I have been obsessive about applying for HGTV, InStyle, and DIY apparently I am not interesting enough to deserve a make over.
Moving in together and buying a house really ups the anti in the relationship navigation game. Praise to the gods that this time around it was much smoother. No more two hour debates about the type of shower curtains at Target on a Weds night. Now its cutting shelf boards at Home Depot on a Saturday night at 9:30. Romantic...
I think we found our yin and yang together. I am the starter and he is the closer. (Notice the baseball references) We are living relatively box free and even managed to host my mother's birthday party at our home. We also realized that most of our furniture is not child friendly. (Jordan's little footprints are still on our white leather couch. Much to Mike's chagrin) Of course we can't leave you hanging...the big announcement is that...oops ran out of space.